DEFINITION

“Baby” can mean too many things

NEWBORN: 0- 2 months (when a yawn or sneeze is a delight)

INFANT: 2-12 months (monthly milestones that may cause you sleepless nights if not met)

TODDLER: 1 year (because they toddle when learning to walk, get it?)

PRESCHOOLER: 2-4 years (the daycare/speech training/potty life)

BABY: Up to when they start school (and forever)

CHILD: Kindergarten-Elementary School (don’t you dare call them a baby!)

KID: Elementary School (not dependent on actual age: “Here’s looking at you, kid”)

TWEEN: 10-13

TEENAGER: 13-18 (depending on country)

ADULT: You’ve made it! They’re on their own now!

What does all this mean? Nothing. Like when someone refers to their child being 32 months old. Let’s not take ourselves too seriously, guys.